Another one

Humorous, but contemplative as well…

A teacher asks….

(Author unknown)

After being interviewed by the school administration, the prospective teacher said:
‘Let me see if I’ve got this right.
‘You want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, censor their T-shirt messages, and instill in them a love for learning.
‘You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride.
‘You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a checkbook, and apply for a job.
‘You want me to check their heads for lice, recognize signs of antisocial behavior, and make sure that they all pass the final exams.
‘You also want me to provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents in English, Spanish or any other language, by letter, telephone, newsletter, and report card.
‘You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard,a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps.
‘You want me to do all this and then you tell me. . . I CAN’T PRAY?

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Lounge talk

This is going to be short (sandman is calling) but I just wanted to say something about talk in the lounge.  Teachers talk about many things of course, like family, current events, the weather, etc.  A favorite topic, also of course, is students.  How did such and such student behave today?  What students are failing miserably?  Oh, let me tell you of the cavity searches I had to do today.  Wait- what?!?  Cavity searches??  One of the gym teachers came down to lunch and started talking about this.  I have no idea what was being searched for, and didn’t get any other details in fact.  Fortunately.  This was just so off the wall I had to mention it even without complete information.  There was also mention of a student who ran out the front door and a teacher who almost ran after her.  The secretary told her to let it go and she would call the police.  From what I understand she didn’t get very far hobbling along in an ankle brace…

Ahh, middle school.  And I have another day of it tomorrow, different school fortunately, and it’s getting late so goodnight.

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Just a laid-back day

I was a substitute today, but hardly a teacher.  As middle school science goes, all the classes were the same unlike a subject such as math where there are usually different levels taught or a foreign language where different grades are taught.  I pretty much just announced a pending notebook check and then let them continue on their projects which they started yesterday.  That is to say, they already knew what they were doing so I didn’t even get to go over that.  Ah, well.  Mostly I just sat and watched them work, periodically cycling around the room to remind them of my presence and to help out if needed.  Fortunately so I didn’t expire from boredom, some did need my help from time to time.

This went on for six. long. periods.  But it could have been worse.  At least I was in a district where most of the kids had a work ethic.  Some schools I have been in have had a large number of kids with a goof-off-while-the-teacher-is-away ethic instead.

Well, language arts tomorrow at another middle school.  Until then.

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Believe it or not

It is April 1 after all.  How old does one have to be to have criminal intent?  Well, there were those ten-year-olds a few years ago who tossed a five-year-old off of a balcony, but how about eight or nine?  And an actual plot to attack a teacher?  Among not one, not two, but nine students?  Read on…

Police Release Photos of Weapons in Waycross Plot

Help me make the music of the…

Hmm. Mr. Webber’s Phantom of the Opera line doesn’t quite work since this was during the day. How about, “The hills are alive, with the sound of music…” Yep, that works better. If you haven’t guessed by now the position I subbed for today was music. Elementary music. Like most specials jobs in the district I was in, it was a traveling job, but fortunately this time I went to the right school first. The first two classes were great. They were fourth graders and they were really focused. As they were in a unit about stage productions/musicals, they got to watch a video with scenes with a couple of famous dancers if you thought of Billy Elliot, you are dead wrong. In fact, he’s not even real. Did you know there is actually a musical based on this movie by the way?. Nope, not Michael Flatley. At least he’s real, but you are thinking too modern! Go way back to the 1930s-1950s to get this one. Okay, you have them- Fred Astaire and Gene Autry… No wait, not the kind of dancing that involves bullets at your feet- Gene Kelly of course.

Anyway, they saw scenes from a few shows including Ziegfeld Follies, Royal Wedding, and, of course, Singin’ in the Rain. In Royal Wedding, There was a strange scene where Astaire danced not only on the floor, but on the walls and ceiling as well! If you go to the Royal Wedding link and check out the trivia for it you can find out how they did it. These days they would just use computers of course. The kids really enjoyed that scene, as well as Kelly getting wet in Singin’ in the Rain.

I wish I could say that the fifth graders at the other school did as well with this video, but I can’t. There were technical difficulties (the LMC gave me a DVD player that was broken- it wouldn’t play the disc) and the first class just talked and talked, even after I finally got another player and started the movie. The second class was a little better, but still excitable during some scenes. The third class did much better, though not quite up to the fourth graders.

Finally, I had lunch then four afternoon classes with younger grades. No video for them, but instead the second graders worked on a show they were doing- we just went through all their songs on CD. I noticed this show involves the fifth grade as well. At first I wondered why the teacher didn’t have me do this plan with that grade, but remembering how the first two classes went I quickly shelved that question. First grade had yet a different lesson, which we only got partway through, but that was expected by the teacher. Well, that’s it for now.

Math dyslexia?

I have heard of dyslexia of course, but this is the first time I have heard of math dyslexia.  Apparently this condition makes for a very hard time in math.  One Florida teacher is finding that he may not be allowed to teach since he can’t pass a required basic math skills test due to his disability.  Where this gets interesting is he is an art teacher.  No math involved in what he teaches.  The rules say it doesn’t matter, all teachers must pass this test.  However, he has people fighting for him.  Click the link to read the article:

 Math dyslexia imperils Orange County art teacher’s job

Wake up sleeping student and get sued?

Apparently parents of a high school student are considering just that after a teacher woke up a student by slapping her hand on the student’s desk.  According to their claim he suffered hearing loss as his ear was on the desk at the time and the sudden sound ruptured his eardrum.  If this is true, then I fully understand the parents’ concern, but something doesn’t seem quite right here.  From the article:

Barry said the boy’s ear hurt instantly after Nadeau hit his desk.

“He woke up and immediately felt pain in his ear,” Barry said. “I think he was so taken aback that he didn’t say anything at the time.”

The next day, Vinicios’ parents took him to the hospital after he complained of hearing loss and they discovered a bloody fluid on his pillow.

If his eardrum burst as they say, wouldn’t he have been in so much pain he would have said something?  Screamed out in pain?  Immediately gone to the nurse? I just don’t know…

Sleepy Student Claims Teacher’s Wake-Up Slam Caused Hearing Loss